Good-bye, cruel world!

I feel like throwing myself in front of a truck. Warning: Extended gripe ahead.

Today was just the most insane day. It even started out crazy. I had this horrible nightmare about my upcoming high school reunion. It took place in a Paris train station (sounds cool, but it wasn’t, as the only other people that spoke English were my former classmates and all the toilets were stopped up) and it lasted several days, kind of like summer camp. The truly horrible part was that I got completely dissed by my high school sweetheart. He was all like, “I’m never going out with you again.” And I’m like, “Dude, I’m married. I don’t want to “go out” with you. I have a son.” But he was unconvinced and acted all smirky every time he walked by me. And throughout the entire dream, I was continually looking for the bathroom.

So then, Auggie wakes up at ungodly-6 in the morning. Tim, saint that he is, left me to sleep in and got up with the boy (just as he does every morning except the occasional Saturday when I’m feeling benevolent). I awoke at 7:30, ready to hit the phone and harass all of my contacts in Louisville, just as they were getting to work, booting up their computers and enjoying a quiet sip of coffee.

No one answered. Of course. No one ever answers their phone! I live in Voice Mail Purgatory, I swear.

So Tim heads off to work and Auggie and I settle in for some quality Sesame Street time. The phone rings. As I’m talking with contact #1, contact #2 beeps through. It went like this all day.

Today was supposed to be great. I was looking forward to getting together with the ole playgroup at the Zoo, enjoying the amazing weather and generally being at peace with all things. Instead, here is a scenario from this afternoon:

It’s 1:30. Auggie and I are supposed to be leaving for the Zoo, but instead I call fellow playgroup mommy to delay our meeting time by an hour to buy enough time for a shower. Auggie and I are still in our pajamas. We jump in the shower, jump out of the shower and are toweling off, just in time to hear elusive contact of the week leaving a message on the answering machine. $%^&! I run into the office, unsuccessfully try to catch him while he’s on the line and try to call him right back. Of course, he does not answer his phone. While I’m at the computer, I check my email. The phone rings. It’s him! The villagers rejoice! I’m interviewing him for an article, naked. Auggie comes tearing into the room, also naked. It’s at this point that I thank God that I am not on a reality TV series.

We ended up canceling the playgroup and Auggie and I took the dogs out for a walk instead.

The rest of the day was better, but I still have that rush-rush-rush feeling. I hate that feeling.

Of course the two coffees (lattes) I had this evening aren’t helping much.